Sometimes the person — or animal, or thing — doing the action and receiving it is the same. When that happens, English uses a special set of pronouns: myself, yourself, himself, and so on. They're called reflexive pronouns because the action "reflects" back onto the subject — I hurt myself, she taught herself Spanish.

There are eight main ones, and each matches a subject you already know. Once you can pair I with myself and they with themselves, the rest follows the same pattern.

A useful shortcut: the main use of a reflexive pronoun is when the subject and the object are the same. I did something to me becomes I did it to myself. (There are also special uses with by and for emphasis, further down.)

The eight reflexive pronouns

Each subject has its own reflexive form. The singular ones end in -self; the plural ones end in -selves.

Subject Reflexive pronoun Example
I myself I cut myself.
you (one person) yourself Be careful — don't hurt yourself.
he himself He introduced himself.
she herself She taught herself to draw.
it itself The cat washed itself.
we ourselves We enjoyed ourselves.
you (more than one) yourselves Help yourselves to some cake.
they themselves They blamed themselves.

One tricky pair is worth a look: the subject form you stays the same for one person or many, so the reflexive is where the number shows — yourself for one person, yourselves for more than one.

(You may also see oneself in formal English — to enjoy oneself. And when they refers to one person, it uses themselves too. The eight forms in the table are the ones to focus on for now.)

Subject and object are the same

The main job of a reflexive pronoun is to show that the subject and the object of the action are the same. The reflexive can be the object of a verb — I hurt myself — or the object after a preposition — She looked at herself:

  • I hurt myself playing football. (I'm the one who got hurt)
  • She looked at herself in the mirror.
  • He's teaching himself to play the guitar.
  • Did you enjoy yourself at the party?

Here they are next to an ordinary object, which is a different person:

  • I hurt him. (someone else got hurt) → I hurt myself. (I got hurt)
  • She looked at them. → She looked at herself.

When with means "carrying along", and after place words such as behind, beside, near and in front of, though, English usually keeps an ordinary object pronoun: I took my bag with me (not usually with myself), She closed the door behind her. (But the reflexive is right in fixed phrases like be honest with yourself or angry with herself.)

By myself = alone or without help

In the phrase by + reflexive pronoun, the meaning is usually alone or without help:

  • I live by myself. (alone)
  • She fixed the car by herself. (without help)
  • Did you do all this by yourselves?

By myself does not normally mean just by me. If the sentence only says who did something, me is the natural choice after by:

  • ✅ This photo was taken by me. (this just says who took it)
  • ✅ I took the photo by myself. (meaning: without help)

The same forms for emphasis

The same -self / -selves forms can also add emphasis — that a particular person, and not someone else, did something. In this use they don't change the meaning, they just add stress (they're sometimes called intensive pronouns):

  • I made the cake myself. (I did it, nobody else)
  • I cleaned the room myself.
  • The manager herself apologised. (the manager in person)

They often come right after the subject or at the end of the sentence, and they can also stress another noun: I spoke to the manager herself.

Verbs that don't need a reflexive in English

Here's a point that confuses many learners. Some everyday verbs take a reflexive pronoun in other languages but usually don't in English. In their most common meanings, English uses no reflexive:

  • ✅ I feel good today. — not ❌ I feel myself good. (with feel + adjective, English uses no reflexive)
  • ✅ She woke up early. (no object — she simply became awake; a reflexive only fits when the subject causes it: She woke herself up by coughing)
  • ✅ They met at the station. — not ❌ They met themselves at the station.
  • ✅ Hurry up! We're late. is the normal everyday form — hurry yourself up is unusual and not the form you need here.

Some of these verbs can take an object in another meaning — She woke the baby up, Don't hurry me — but they don't reflect back onto the subject the way the wrong examples above do.

For everyday routines, English also tends to drop the reflexive, because it's obvious you do these to yourself:

  • ✅ I wash and get dressed before breakfast. (no myself needed)

A reflexive is added when the object matters or when you mean "without help": The children can dress themselves now.

-self vs each other

When two or more people do something to one another, English uses each other (or one another), not a reflexive pronoun. Some verbs can also be used with no object — They met, They hugged:

  • Tom and Anna love each other. (Tom loves Anna, Anna loves Tom)
  • ❌ Tom and Anna love themselves. would mean Tom loves Tom and Anna loves Anna — a very different idea!

So themselves points the action back at the same people, while each other points it across, from one to the other.

Common mistakes

  • ❌ He cut hisself. → ✅ He cut himself. (it's himself, never hisself)
  • ❌ They blamed theirselves. → ✅ They blamed themselves. (it's themselves, never theirselves)
  • ❌ Children, help yourself! → ✅ Children, help yourselves! (more than one person → yourselves)
  • ❌ I feel myself tired. → ✅ I feel tired. (feel + adjective takes no reflexive)
  • ❌ Please contact myself. → ✅ Please contact me. (here me is the normal object form, not myself)
  • ❌ My brother and myself went shopping. → ✅ My brother and I went shopping. (here I is the subject form)
  • ❌ I washed myself hands. → ✅ I washed my hands. (body parts take a possessive — my, her, his — not a reflexive)

Quick check

Which word or phrase fits?

  1. Sam, be careful with that knife — don't cut ____.
  2. The children are old enough to dress ____ now.
  3. I painted the whole room ____ (alone).
  4. How are you? — I ____ fine today, thanks.
Show answers
  1. yourself   2. themselves   3. by myself   4. feel (not feel myself)

Key takeaways

  • Reflexive pronouns show that the subject and object are the same: myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves.
  • Singular ends in -self, plural in -selves; yourself (one) vs yourselves (more than one) is the pair to watch.
  • After by, a reflexive pronoun usually means alone or without help — I did it by myself. If you only mean who did it, use me: written by me.
  • It can also add emphasis — I made it myself.
  • Some verbs take no reflexive in their everyday meaning: with feel + adjective, ✅ I feel good, not ❌ I feel myself good.