Formal commands with Lei

Scusi, mi dica. Aspetti un momento e si accomodi, per favore.Excuse me, tell me. Wait a moment and take a seat, please.

When you talk politely to one person you address as Lei, you give instructions with the formal imperative. Its endings are the "opposite" of what you might expect: -are verbs end in -i, while -ere and -ire verbs end in -a.

Quick shortcut: -are → -i (parlare → parli). -ere and -ire → -a (scrivere → scriva, dormire → dorma). Pronouns go before the verb: Mi dica! To say don't, add non: Non parli!

1. The regular forms

For most verbs, take the io form of the present, drop the final -o, and add the ending (verbs in -care / -gare add an h, and verbs in -ciare / -giare do not double the i; details below the table):

Verbs in -care and -gare add an h to keep the hard sound (cercare → cerchi, pagare → paghi), and verbs in -ciare and -giare do not double the i (cominciare → cominci, mangiare → mangi).

The -are form (parli) looks like the tu form of the present, but here it is the command to Lei. The informal command of the same verb is different (Parla!). See Informal commands with tu. For Lei itself, see Formal address with Lei.

2. Common irregular forms

A few useful verbs have their own formal imperative:

They come from the same stems as the io form of the present (vado → vada, faccio → faccia, dico → dica, vengo → venga, esco → esca), with a few exceptions (dia, stia, sia, abbia). For these verbs in the present, see Present tense: common irregular verbs and Present tense: other common irregular verbs.

3. Pronouns go before the verb

With Lei, short pronouns come before the verb, not after it. This is the big difference from the tu command (Dimmi!, Aiutami!):

• Mi dica! (Tell me!)
• Mi scusi. (Excuse me.)
• Lo prenda. (Take it.)
• Si sieda, per favore. (Please sit down.)
• Si accomodi. (Please make yourself comfortable / come in.)

The reflexive pronoun si is used with Lei: accomodarsi, sedersi and preoccuparsi become Si accomodi, Si sieda and Non si preoccupi.

4. Saying "don't"

For a negative command to Lei, put non in front of the same Lei form. Unlike the tu command, the verb does not change to the infinitive:

• Non parli così forte. (Don't talk so loudly.)
• Non si preoccupi. (Don't worry.)
• Non dimentichi le chiavi. (Don't forget the keys.)
• Non aspetti qui. (Don't wait here.)

Pronouns still go before the verb in the negative: Non mi chiami dopo le dieci.

5. Making it even more polite

You can soften a command with per favore, pure (which means "go ahead") or un momento:

• Si accomodi pure. (Please go ahead and sit down.)
• Mi scusi un momento. (Excuse me for a moment.)
• Mi dia il conto, per favore. (Give me the bill, please.)

For polite requests with vorrei and potrebbe, see Polite requests with vorrei and potrei.

Common mistakes

• ❌ Parla più piano, signora. → ✅ Parli più piano, signora. (the Lei command of -are verbs ends in -i)
• ❌ Scrivi il suo nome, signore. → ✅ Scriva il suo nome, signore. (-ere and -ire verbs end in -a)
• ❌ Dica mi! → ✅ Mi dica! (with Lei the pronoun goes before the verb)
• ❌ Non parla così forte, signora. → ✅ Non parli così forte, signora. (for a negative command, non goes before the Lei command form, not the present)
• ❌ Mi scusa! → ✅ Mi scusi! (the Lei command of -are verbs ends in -i; scusa is the tu command)

Quick check

Give the polite command to someone you address as Lei:

1. (aspettare) ____ qui, per favore.
2. (scrivere) ____ il suo indirizzo.
3. (aprire) ____ la finestra.
4. (venire) ____ con me.
5. (dire) ____ pure.
6. Say "Don't worry" with preoccuparsi.

Key takeaways

• The Lei command has the "opposite" endings: -are → -i (parli), -ere / -ire → -a (scriva, dorma, finisca).
• Irregular: vada, faccia, dia, stia, dica, venga, esca, sia, abbia.
• Pronouns go before the verb: Mi dica! Si accomodi! Lo prenda.
• To say "don't", put non before the same Lei form: Non si preoccupi.
• Softeners such as per favore, pure and un momento make a command friendlier.